TATTOOS + MENTAL HEALTH

TATOO(s):

REASONING AND MEANING:

Remember how I talked about suicidal thoughts and tendencies in the Dolls Kill post? Well theres a little more to it. I have depression and use to self harm for a few years before getting my tattoos, I also use to drink heavily. At first, before getting this tattoo, my mindset was I will get these words on my wrists and it'll all stop. Of course that's not how life works. But I was 18 and coming out of a very dark time any teenager would struggle with. Once getting the tattoos, I was just happy they were finally there and instead of scars, there was a beautiful reminder that I can make it through anything. Another mind set was I won't want to ruin the tattoo, thus no cutting. That didn't work out either, but stopped within a few months after getting them, and I haven't done it since! Today, these tattoos still have that meaning but now apply to my everyday life. Having a bout of depression in the middle of the day isn't the worst thing, I can get through it. Nothing is the end of the world.

(Tiny little story: I got bit by a mosquito in Venice, Italy on my wrist and kept scratching at it, it eventually created a hole in my skin, luckily it healed well and you can't even tell. I was flipping shit for days, scared it would mess up the ink.)

GETTING MY TATTOO: *Once you get one, you'll want more* My father decided to out of the blue take my ex-boyfriend and I to the tattoo shop, having no wallet because I wasn't expecting to go anywhere that I'd be paying for something, my father paid my deposit $60 (the next day he told me I was a disgrace for getting a tattoo, and hates that he paid my deposit). So I went home printed the design (Yes, it's Demi Lovato) and got it done. Pain was a lot less than I was expecting, the crossing of the T's hurt the most. It took about an hour and was around $450. My ex was on the fence about getting a tattoo but since mine didn't hurt. He quickly found a cross off the internet and started to get his done. He now tells people it is my fault he got it and that it was painful. Girls have a high pain tolerance than guys, sorry that's just how it is. Don't get tattoos on a whim, plan them out! I had mine planned for 2 years. Make sure it's what you want.

Hope this is kind of what you guys wanted/expected? If it's not just let me know. Thank you all for your support with the blog and the insta. Also thanks to the sweethearts that check on me when you think I've had a sucky day or just posted something about being anxious etc. I am doing much better than I was at 16, but I have also grown since then. Everyone has their good days and their bad. Luckily I have a lot of more good days than bad ones. Would you consider this one tattoo or two? I never know how to refer to it...

XO

Chrissy's Closet